We All Have A Weakness
But Some Of Ours Are Easier To Identify
I'm shaking.
I can't stop.
At first, I would have said that I regretted nothing.
To be honest, there is still a lot that I do not regret, or would not do over.
There is, however, the fact that I have been used.
You had been planning this for a long time.
I saw that.
What still makes me wonder though is why I even bothered to let it pass and think that it could get better.
Because I cared, maybe?
Because it meant more to me than to just throw it away?
Apparently it meant nothing to you by that point.
And you lied to me.
I let you do it, too. You threw so many obvious things in my direction...
I feel like a fucking idiot.
I still can't believe that this is what it took for me to realize how much of a coward you are, how selfish you can be.
I loved you.
You threw me away.
I loved you.
You lied to me.
I loved you.
You hid.
I am only hoping that the girl that seems to trust you doesn't get the same treatment I, or any of the others, got. To be tossed aside when something easier or more appealing came along.
Remember, don't make promises you can't keep.
I feel used, inadequate, angry, devoured.
I now realize how much of an idiot I was to ever trust you, to open up to you, to love you. Not when you threw me away like everyone else has, like I told you that you eventually would.
It hasn't been only me, either.
Somewhere in my chest, there is a hollow spot... Just for you. I still don't understand why, nor do I want to; I only intend to fill it with whatever I can find. Dirt, blood, sleep, it doesn't matter.
I only know that I refuse to let myself feel any more anguish over someone who no longer cares. I refuse to let myself rot when to you, it makes no difference.
There are some things I need to burn.
Photographs, clothing... Bridges.
-Yours Maniacally.-
